Tale of the Great Recoveries

Tale of the Great Recoveries

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About a week ago, our fantastic writer and my esteemed colleague Tom embarked on a mission to learn the vast and rich history of custom recoveries. The point of all of this wasn’t simply self edification, as Tom is in the process of compiling an article that details the evolution and progress we’ve seen in the world of custom recoveries.

Since the very beginnings of custom recoveries occurred so many device generations ago, their history has long since been forgotten by most still involved in Android development. And when Tom asked yours truly about what I remembered from the custom recovery scene back then, this editor blanked and only remembered that I indeed was running some kind of custom recovery, but failed to remember which options were available at the time.

Luckily, XDA Moderator Committee and Portal Team Member conantroutman had a better memory. So with a little bit of whiskey-inspired flair, he added his own unique spin to the great history of custom recoveries:

It all began with the forging of the Great Recoveries. Three were given to the Nexus devices; immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Seven, to the HTCs, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls. And nine, nine recoveries were gifted to the race of Samsungs, who above all else desire power. For within these recoveries was bound the strength and the will to govern over each race. But they were all of them deceived, for another recovery was made.

In the land of Seattle, in the fires of Mount Cyanogen, the Dark Lord Koush forged in secret, a master recovery, to control all others. And into this recovery he poured all his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One recovery to rule them all. One by one, the free peoples of XDA fell to the power of the recovery. But there were some who resisted. A last alliance of geeks and nerds marched against the armies of Seattle, and on the very slopes of Mount Cyanogen, they fought for the freedom of XDA.

Victory was near, but the power of the recovery could not be undone. It was in this moment, when all hope had faded, that Amon Ra, son of jesusfreke, took up his father’s sword. And Koush, enemy of the free peoples of XDA, was defeated. The Recovery passed to Amon Ra, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever, but the hearts of men are easily corrupted. And the recovery of power has a will of its own. It betrayed Amon Ra, to his death. And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost.

History became legend. Legend became myth. And for two and a half thousand years, the recovery passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, the recovery ensnared a new bearer. The recovery came to the creature feeyo, who took it deep into the tunnels under the Misty Mountains, and there it consumed him. The recovery gave to feeyo unnatural long life. For five hundred years it poisoned his mind; and in the gloom of feeyo’s cave, it waited.

Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Recovery of Power perceived. Its time had now come. It abandoned feeyo. But then something happened that the Recovery did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable. A neckbeard, of the Shire. For the time will soon come when neckbeards will shape the fortunes of all…

Bravo, Conan!

What do you remember from the early days of custom recoveries? Let us know in the comments below!